George Herron
cjherron
pacmanxu
slapshot66
Quick Hits
Posted by George Herron on July 31, 2009
Welcome to Quick Hits, where we know the Brett Farve saga isn't over yet.
Friday, FRIday, FRIDAYYYYYYYY! Thank God, another work week over and another Quick Hits to inform and enlighten you! A slower week for sure, but I found some nuggets you all will love. So, get naked, sit back, get crazy it’s the weekend, and enjoy Quick Hits.
- Brett Farve finally makes a decision and stays retired. Is this the end or will we have to suffer through this again next year? I can only hope that he is finally done, although don’t rule out some team calling him halfway through the season begging him to play and he says “yes.” He has said several times that he hates the pre-season, so I am sure the Vikings, Browns, 49ers, Broncos, and any other team that doesn’t have a quarterback will be calling after training camp ends. I guess Madden finally convinced him that now was the time to settle down and raise some Ewoks. Boom, roasted.
See, Pimp Goodell is about to slap down his ho the NFL.
- The NFL Draft will now be on three days starting on Thursday night. It was bad, but tolerable when they changed the draft from one day to two. I loved blocking out an entire Saturday and dedicating it to football, it gets kind of hard to explain to the wife that I need to do nothing for two straight days except watch people talk about draft picks. But it was understandable to break it up a little bit and it was still the weekend. But now we are starting it on a Thursday, so we are hitting two week days and then hitting the ass end of the draft on Saturday. Tough to get a party together for that! This might be the first absolute wrong move the NFL has made in many years. This is a move all about ratings and money, and don’t let them tell you any different. NFL, this had better be a successful move for you or you know Pimp Goodell is going to break out the baby powder. Boom, roasted.
- In overexposed story number two – Michael Vick gets reinstated to the NFL, sort of. He is allowed to participate in all training camp practices and he is allowed to play in two pre-season games. But then he is suspended again for the last two pre-season games and the first four regular season games. Of course he has to find a team willing to sign him and apparently no one is lining up to give him a chance. Even all the teams I listed above have the common sense to stay away from Vick, despite needing a quarterback. I stand by the fact that I think he would be best served by playing arena ball. Michael, look for your phone to ring right after Ryan Leaf’s does. Boom, roasted.
- Shaq runs WWE Raw for a night. I love Shaq, I think he is hilarious but was it a good idea to go on WWE Raw? It just comes off as a stunt to stay in the lime light. Over the last couple years Shaq’s dedication to basketball has been wavering and it has showed on the court. Does Shaq see this too? Is that why the shameless self promotion tour lately or is he just a big kid that likes to have fun? I would like to think he is just a big kid. Baseball and steroids has me so disillusioned that I need someone like Shaq to prove that sports are FUN. Don’t let me down Shaq (no pressure). Watching Shaq wrestle was like watching Laura Flynn Boyle eat a sandwich, you could tell they didn’t know what they were doing, but they faked it well. Boom, roasted.
- Ricky Henderson and Jim Rice highlight the class of 2009 into the Baseball Hall of Fame. To everyones’ surprise, Ricky toned down the third person act and was very humble in his induction speech. It was almost like someone put on a Ricky Henderson suit and gave the speech for him. George thinks that Ricky should have got a running start, slid head first into the podium and then held up his plaque and declared himself the great player in the Hall of Fame. In the third person of course. Boom, roasted.
Look, more great parenting from the trailer park princess.
- Follow up story. The Mets have pink slipped fiery executive Tony Bernazard. After trying to fight the entire Double A team and having a shouting match with the Mets closer, Francisco Rodriguez, the Mets decided it would be better if he was not part of their organization. I disagree, he was a great distraction from the fact that the Mets are in the top five in payroll and are losing series to the Nationals. The Mets are 10 games back in the East and 3 games under .500. Now, the Mets general manager Omar Minya is alleging that a news reporter has been stirring stories because he is jockeying for a front office position for the Mets. The Mets have more drama than a Britney Spears custody hearing. Boom, roasted.
- The Reds trade minor league reliever of the year, Robert Manuel, for a 25 year old power hitting outfielder (you know because we don’t have enough of those). All this and the Reds have dropped their last 9 out of 10. They are now 9.5 games out and are doing everything they can to finish last. Are the dark ages back? Did Jim Bowden get hired and I missed it? A giant white flag is being flown above Great American Ballpark starting today to signify the Reds surrender to the rest of the league. Dusty will be wearing white arm bands for the rest of the year. Boom, roasted.
- David Ortiz and Manny Ramirez are outed as steroid users per the 2003 list that keep leaking names. No one is really shocked by either since earlier this year Manny got busted anyway and had to serve a 50 game suspension and Big Pappi suddenly only has middle of the outfield power. Who has this list? How do names keep getting leaked? At this point why not just give us all the names on the list? I think most people would agree that at this point most people just assume that everyone has taken steroids. I am no longer shocked, surprised, appalled, or even care. BUD, FIX THIS MESS NOW. The last 15 years of baseball are about as legitimate as NBA super stars kids. Boom, double roasted.
pacmanxu said
the Browns will never make that call to Favre. They will call on Brett Ratliff before that happens.
The NFL is doing this draft stuff for ratings, but i won’t watch as much of it, and i usually watch most of it. This is too drawn out, too long, and smacks of effort, man (imagine in stoner voice).